Bringing Sexy Back Postpartum

Sex. It’s a beautiful thing - created for recreation, rejuvenation and reproduction. However, no one likes to talk about it. It’s one of, if not the most taboo topics ever thanks to our parents, grandparents and the countless others before us - yet they ended up with a minimum of 2 children each. Something isn’t adding up!

As a woman, while pregnant or even after you’ve had a baby, society expects you to hold it down in the bedroom, be able to keep up with your partner’s sex drive and keep it spicy. I remember while I was pregnant, an older woman told me “I hope you’re pleasing your husband. You know they are more prone to cheating while you’re pregnant right?” Excuh-uuuuse?! Like if I wasn’t already under pressure with all the hormonal and physical changes my body is going through, now I have to split in the middle, let my husband spin me like a satellite dish and prove that I’m not no boring gyal all so he doesn’t cheat on me?? How unfair is that?! Sidenote: If a man wants to cheat, he will... and no acrobatics in the bedroom will prevent that.

Anywho, let’s talk sex after pregnancy/after the baby is born. It’s no secret that after you birth a whooole baby, nothing is normal down there. As a matter of fact, it takes a minimum of 6 weeks to get back to some sense of normalcy; before that, it’s literally blood, sweat and tears. Furthermore, during postpartum, you are urged to begin a form of contraception (primarily a birth control injection) because that’s the time when you’re most fertile and can easily get pregnant again. WTF?! It seems like you can’t catch a break, so it’s no surprise that getting back some sort of sex drive or feeling down there is tough and takes time. Everything has changed and I mean EVERYTHING.

Let’s start with your sex drive. Your sex drive may diminish or it may be even stronger than ever before. Sex may feel like a chore sometimes, other times, you want to jump your partner 24/7. Sometimes you may be raring to go but your v just isn’t lubricated enough to get you where you want to be. Acts that would’ve been a definite green light pre- and even during pregnancy can turn to a red light during postpartum and vice versa. Even acts that would’ve been a definite red light are now yellow (something you wouldn’t mind trying with a bit of caution). Now the rules have changed in the bedroom. You’re different. You’ve evolved. Now you get to explore, redefine your sexy and redefine your sex life and it will be hella fun! Trust me!

So wear the lingerie, use the lube, buy the toys! Most of all, be patient with yourself. You won’t be a virgin again, but in some ways you’ll definitely feel like one!